Week 13, Day 4

Last week we had our 12 weeks sonogram! It was good to find out we didn't kill the baby while in Egypt - all that smoke and pollution... ugh! The sonogram was amazing! I thought that the 8 week sonogram was a big jump from the small little speck we saw at 4 weeks while Dr. Binford was searching for the gestational sac. She had mentioned that little speck of grey and said, "That may or may not be your baby... it's just too small to tell right now." We were initially impressed at 8 weeks from our speck to blob transformation - but nothing could have prepared me for the JOY of the sonogram at 12 weeks.

First of all - we go to a special office to do the sonograms. The perinatal office happens to be in a building off the highway that is located right next to our condos. As in, sitting in the waiting room you can see our building out the window. It was literally less than a 3 minute walk. I try to schedule our baby appointments on days when Matt doesn't have a fourth class so that he can leave work early and meet me at the office. Although we scheduled it on the correct day Matt ended up having a big meeting he had to attend after his last class - so we were a bit worried that he wouldn't make it. I arrived to the office by myself, waited about 20 minutes and was called back before Matt got there! Thankfully the office had to stick my finger and collect my blood and thankfully my blood was running slow because when Matt did get there he just saw some medical assitant sticking me for the second time to draw enough blood. Then! Sonogram time! The office has a big flatscreen tv mounted on the wall so that when I lay on the table I can see the baby instead of having to twist around and look at the computer screen. The lady came in and squirted the *warm* gel on my stomach and before you know it - there was our baby on the big screen. Not only was our baby beautiful - it was also ridiculously active! So much that the sonographer could barely catch the heart beat or any sort of photo that could be measured. The baby was jumping all over the place - up and down and back and forth. A-MAY-ZING! I don't know what I was expecting but I couldn't believe all that was taking place inside of me. Matt seemed astounished too, since he asked, "Can't you feel any of that?" But that baby is so small - about 3 inches in length - that I just can't feel it yet. It looked alot like the baby had the hiccups because its whole body would shoot into the air and then come down and then shoot into the air again - hands and feet flailing. I'm so thankful that Matt made it to that appointment because I don't think I could have described it. I was laughing and crying and astounished all at the same time.

I couldn't take it anymore and I added the pictures to Facebook - so now, everyone knows - or at least has the ability to know.

We scheduled out anatomy appointment for Feb. 24th at 4:30pm. Boy or Girl!?!?!?! I just don't know! Lots of dreams about it being a boy. In fact at the beginning when we weren't sure if it was a viable pregnancy Matt and I had a dream on the same night and in each one we were playing with a healthy baby boy! That next day we found out that it was in the uterus! And now look at it! It has a nose and mouth and brain! Incredible. I'm so excited to find out what we're having I can hardly stand it. I feel like once we know we can 1) start looking at baby stuff and 2) seriously start thinking about names. Matt and I spent an evening trying to look at different boy and girl names that we liked and I just got discouraged and decided that I didn't want to try to think about names again until we knew the sex. Why on earth would I want to struggle through two names when I can just pick one! One is better. We have a hard time argeeing. Yesterday I decided in passing that I like the name Lilly. When I asked Matt if he liked that name he asked, "for a person!?!" - sigh.

In other news - the couple of days after we got back from Egypt I started feeling a lot better. My energy levels were higher and I wasn't feeling nauseated at all! Make-up, earrings, nice outfits, cooking dinner -- all were making a come back. But the last couple of days I've been feeling a little sick. I spent Saturday with Wendell and Mary Jane and I felt just awful. Sunday was better - but both yesterday and especially today I feel bad again. Today I almost feel as sick as I did before leaving for Egypt. I've just staying in my pajamas and focused on not throwing up. There have been a couple close calls. I THOUGHT this was OVER! Silly baby...

One more thing: on Saturday when I was at work Matt made of list of things to do for himself. Do the dishes, brush Niko, etc. etc. One of the things he wanted to do was write short essays in English and then translate them to Spanish - just for practice (You know because my husband is brillant and incredibly self-motivated). Well, anyways - today I found the file on the computer that he did that in. He apparently just asked himself questions - answered them - and then translated it into Spanish. Well ONE of the questions he asked himself was "How do I feel about becoming a father?" And I just can't help but add his answer to our baby blog. Here you are - pure, unadulturated Matt thoughts:

First and foremost, I feel overwhelmingly happy that I get to be around such a joyous thing as a baby. I look forward to helping a young mind form at every stage. Ironically, I also enjoy the prospect of having to struggle through the hard parts as well. God may humble me through the experience. I will inevitably learn discipline and how to love beyond what I have ever loved before. Additionally, I feel a bit scared or overwhelmed thinking about how delicate and helpless a newborn is. I worry about dropping or crushing the poor thing.

People have children with fewer resources and love in their heart all the time. God is with us and we will be fine.

I am in love with him!